I'm reeling today from a situation that happened yesterday. I can't explain the details here yet, but I have shed many tears and muttered many prayers to try and work through it all.
So....since it's still my 2012 Advent Challenge no matter how I feel.....I guess the question is "How do I see God work and find God's inspiration when I'm feeling so sad(and angry, and fearful, and discouraged)?"
For today, I would have to say that I have found God underneath all the yucky feelings in a level of peace that I know would only be possible with God. I have found the introspection and desire to do things the right way....work through my feelings, confront the people that need to be confronted in a (mostly) calm, rational way, and to work to forgive and not allow bitterness to take root in my heart. I reached out to people that had professional information to help me, too. I am not willing to just sit back and be a victim.
At the same time, it's not easy to accept the reality that I have no real control about the chance of a repeat appearance in the future of this same situation.
It was incredibly difficult to get out of bed this morning...and not only because the sleep I got was broken and restless. Facing the day was not easy, but it had to be done.
Advent is a time of penance....and my Advent penance has definitely been provided! I would have rather given up chocolate!
"I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me"....I have repeated this phrase many times today.
I am trying to see how God can bring good out of the situation we find ourselves in and I am trying to praise Him through it all!
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