Children Are Gifts

Happy belated Mother's Day!  

My mother's day was a mix of really nice...and also surreal.  

First for the nice......

Sunday was the tail end of a VERY busy weekend!  We threw a surprise 16th birthday party for Sarah!  Friday was filled with grocery shopping, decorating, cooking, and a sleepover, followed by a day in Newport with Sarah and her friends on Saturday!  It was awesome...and exhausting!  I have tons of pictures to share...but that's going to be it's very own post! Stay tuned...coming soon(I promise)!

Sunday was a really nice Mother's Day with my family!  It started off with Mass, then a quick breakfast ala Jay.  I had the bucket full of dandelions picked by Luke and Kate!  Lukie made me a super sweet card and had Jay help him with a coupon book...which I promptly used to get a special hug!  Peter had made me a special card, a "stained glass" candle, and a coffee scrub! Mike and Andrew both gave me wonderful Mother's Day hugs and were quick to answer any request I had during the day...there were no garbage bags hanging out in the kitchen on Sunday!

 Ellie and Sarah were super sweet!  Ellie made me a beautiful pair of purple rosary beads and she put two pictures of all her siblings into a brooch that had been my grandmother's!  Sarah sewed me a super cute bag! Both girls were very thoughtful!

Jon had also put a lot of thought into the day as well.  He and Andrew both cleaned out the van on Saturday morning before I took Sarah and her friends to Newport.  That is a gift I love...the gift of a clean car!  Jon also got me a very funny card.  Jon had to work on Sunday afternoon...he works at a local ice cream place.  Jon asked Jay to come by halfway through his shift and pick up a special strawberry sundae that he made just for me as a surprise!

I was thoroughly spoiled by all my children! (By my awesome husband, too, who did most of the cooking and clean up..not to mention some pretty flowers and a sweet card!)  

We had my family and his family over for lunch.  Everyone brought something to share so it was a very easy, laid back meal. The guys all grilled and we all ate way too much!  It was nice just hanging out and watching the Red Sox Game.  My sil, Julie, was here and she is expecting for the very first time!  That made Mother's Day extra special!

The surreal is actually some very sad news that we found out after church.  A friend, Linda, who we were close to a long time ago and had recently reconnected with on Facebook, lost her grown son , Jay, who was hit by a car the night before.  It was such a shock...and our heart just broke for her loss.  We were close friends 17 years ago and met through a Bible study.  We had gone through a lot together....she was part of a group of friends that supported us when our daughter, Therese, was born and passed away. Linda was going through a lot back then as well.  Her oldest son passed away from Leukemia just a few months after Therese died.  We shared "Mama grief" then....so to hear that she was now carrying the cross of losing another son just broke my heart!(Jay's, too!)

I haven't seen Linda's Jay since he was a teenager.  In my head, he is still that handsome, out going, enthusiastic teenager that would bound into the room full of energy and a giant smile.  Seeing pictures posted on Facebook as a man felt so strange.  Pictures with his wife and 3 beautiful daughters...and the evident love and joy on their faces made my heart break even more!

There have been past Mother's Days where I have felt disappointed when the day didn't go like I had planned in my head!  Kids sick or misbehaving or feeling like it was more like "Grandmother's Day" since it took most of the day to honor both our moms and that "my" Mother' s Day honoring would only be "fit in"(possibly) in 2 half hour slots somewhere within the day!  This was a problem with my attitude and perception......

This year, I can say that I didn't feel that way.  In fact, while we were at Mass, the strongest feeling running through me was gratitude!  I just felt so grateful for the 9 blessings that God sent me that made me a mother.  I didn't need anyone to "honor" me....I was just so grateful for all of them and for the privilege to just BE a mother!

When we found out the tragic news after Mass, it made me appreciate them even more!  I hugged all of them a little tighter that day.  My children are not truly mine. That's not something I like to think about!  Right now, we have the growing up and out struggles as young adults become more independent and Jay and I learn to let go.  We have the growing pains of middle schoolers and high schoolers right on the young adults' heels....and we have to do this all.over.again!  We face the challenges of raising a special needs child who will never be able to live independently.  We have the growing pains of 2 pre-schoolers who are no longer babies...and face a future where the next babies in this house will very probably be of the "grandbaby variety'!(but no rush on the grandbabies!)  

Ironically, our jobs as mothers is to nurture and teach and love so that they will be able to follow the path that God leads them in....which, inevitably is always away from us! But that's a good thing.....

It felt like our past and our present collided on Sunday...and I'm still processing through it all!  Jay's death reminds me that we don't know the length of any of our children's journeys in this life.  That's an extremely scary concept for me!  I know from experience that God provides the grace to get through tragedies.....but that doesn't mean I ever want to go through one again!  And yet, this is the cross my friend, Linda, carries.  Again.  And though we haven't spoken personally, the words she has posted since Jay's passing has been a witness to her faith in God, her gratefulness to the gift Jay was in the time that she had him, and her humbleness in trusting God despite not understanding why this tragedy had to happen.

Please say a prayer for Jay's parents, Linda and Bryan, his wife, Jennifer, their daughters, Madison, Gianna, and Leigha, and his sister, Julie, who are just starting their long walk through grief and the journey to figure out a "new normal" as they put their lives back together without Jay.  It's not an easy one!

Now I'm off to hug my kids again....and to send up a grateful prayer that I can!

***A Go Fund me account has been set up for Jay's wife and children.  If you feel called to help, here's the link.

April Updates

I can't believe I haven't blogged in two weeks!  I really miss my blog space!  Things are so crazy between our "normal chaos" and my new Jamberry business!  I'm still trying to find a rhythm and I need to carve out some blogging time!

It's not only me that has a lot going on around here!  Here's 7 Quick Take Friday catch ups....on a Saturday!  (I know....day late, dollar short..like always!;)

#1:  Mike

Mike is getting ready to begin his last week of student teaching!  He will be graduating on May 16th with a History Major/Education Minor!!!!  He has already started to apply to middle school and high school teaching positions!   I am completely dumbfounded that I could possibly have a child that is graduating from college!!! UN...BE...LIEVABLE!  Just !!!!!!!!!!

#2:  Andrew

Andrew is in the last couple of weeks of his Sophomore Year as a Computer Science Major.  He transferred from UMass Dartmouth to Assumption for this school year.  He did well....but did not enjoy the dorming experience.:(  So....he has decided to transfer back to UMASS Dartmouth!  We will be happy to have him back home!:)  On a side note...I now have lots of experience dealing with college transfers between Mike and Andrew.  Any questions...just ask me?

#3:  Jon

Jon is finishing his Freshman Year of College at UMass Dartmouth as a Mechanical Engineering Major.  He has done really well...especially in his calculus classes.(Thank-you Hamel math genes!) He's hoping to get a TA position next year.  He has enjoyed being at a school for the first time ever by himself!(and isn't thrilled Andrew is returning to "his school"!:)  After job searching for several weeks, he just got 2 jobs at 2 different ice cream places on the same day this week!(We are all looking forward to the family discounts;)

#4:  Sarah

Sarah is a Sophomore in high school and doing very, very well in school!  She is only a few weeks away from turning 16!!!!!! (She.can't.wait to get her permit! I, on the other hand, am sooooo not ready for that!)  She is smart and beautiful and loves learning about everything...especially math or science related!

#5:  Peter

Peter is having a good year in his school program.  He has grown a lot this year and continues to love all things Disney and Southwest Airlines!(bc that's the plane we take to Disney;)  He also loves to go for scooter rides around our neighborhood now that the snow has (finally) gone away!

#6:  Ellie

Ellie just had her 12th birthday!  She has grown sooooo much this year and it won't be long until she is as tall as me! Jay thinks she is going to grow a lot more still....which is good for her role as a basketball player!  She just got braces on, is finishing her first year in middle school, and is growing up way.too.fast!

#7:  Luke & Kate

7 has to be a two for one deal! #largefamilypromblems!

Luke and Kate are both doing great!  Luke will be graduating from pre-school in June and is definitely ready for Kindergarten!  Although, I'm sad that he will be away from me all day during the school year next year...sigh:( Luke is still obsessed with all things Lego and Star Wars.  Whenever Jay is home, the familiar cry is "Play with me, Daddy!" They spend HOURS building Lego Star Wars ships from all the bins of random pieces that we've had since Andrew and Jon were little!  Luke is thrilled to be able to get outside in his sandbox after this long winter!

Kate is my at-home buddy and is growing up right before my eyes.  She is almost 3.5 and is a mix of sweet and sassy!  She is VERY strong willed....she reminds me of the sour patch kid commercial:  "First she's sour, then she's sweet."  She adores her siblings....especially Luke and her big sisters!  She follows Luke around copying everything he does...and Luke is such a gentle, loving brother! Kate can switch between playing Star Wars and princesses in the blink of an eye!  Listening her to belt out Disney princess songs is one of the sweetest.things.ever!  She loves the color pink and almost never goes a day without at least one article of pink clothing on...if not her whole outfit!  She is getting so big, so fast!(sniff)

Have a great weekend!

7 Quick Takes Happy Easter Edition!:)

Happy Easter!  Sharing some Easter Pics for 7 Quick Takes Friday!

1.  Easter Outfits!

#2:  Family Pic

My good friend, Colleen, always gets these great family pics near the alter of all her kids color coordinated!  So I begged asked my kids for just one quick family pic!(no matching required!)  Everyone cooperated EXCEPT Luke!  He was upset because he wanted to wear his "homemade" Luke Skywalker costume..... 

...Yep.....that's it! Oh the joys!

#3:  Egg Hunt

It was cold but sunny on Easter so we were able to have our annual Egg Hunt with my in-laws!  The littles looked like pros!:)

Luke and my nephew, Brayden

My niece, Mya

 #4:  Cousin Pic!

#5:  Sisters

#6:  Daddy with Older Daughters....

....And Sons!

 #7:  And Then There Were Two!

On Giving and Receiving

I'm sorry...I totally cannot get back into a blogging rhythm!  Life feels like it's running at warp speed and I'm in a ship without a hyper drive!

(In case anyone is wondering, that was a Star Wars reference...which Luke is STILL obsessed about! He walks around the house re-enacting Star Wars scenes and "pew-pewing" everything!  It is super cute!  His favorite scene to enact right now is when Luke Skywalker is captured by the Wampa and hung upside down in its cave.  Then Luke Skywalker  has to use the force to get his lightsaber and cut himself free.  OUR Luke hangs over the back of the love seat and places the light saber just out of reach.  Then he pretends to stumble out of the cave!  He is such a cutie!)

Lent has felt REALLY long this year!  I'm glad we have almost made it to Easter!  I can't say I have been perfect with my Lenten Penances or the added prayer.  I'd say I was 60% successful, 40% lazy.  I would be lying if I said I didn't feel a little disappointed in myself....I just didn't feel the 'oomph' this year!

I have enjoyed the Dynamic Catholic Lenten series that arrives in my inbox most days. The short inspiring videos and quotes were really good.(I'd say I was 80% successful at watching all the videos!)  Today's video was especially good! It was about using all the little everyday things as ways to lead us to holiness.  He gave some really good ideas that I had never heard before.  It's only 6 minutes so check it out:)... http://pages.dynamiccatholic.com/index.php/email/emailWebview?ftf=true&mkt_tok=3RkMMJWWfF9wsRonuqTLd%2B%2FhmjTEU5z16uUuUaG0lMI%2F0ER3fOvrPUfGjI4DRMFrI%2BSLDwEYGJlv6SgFSLnMMaho1bgOXBY%3D

One other Lenten idea that came through Dynamic Catholic stuck with me the last couple of weeks!  We hear all the time that life is about "give and take".  Their challenge was to think about life as opportunities to "give and receive".  Even saying the words "give and take" vs. "give and receive" gives me a totally different feeling inside.  "Give and take" implies that I am in control of what I get.  It is harsher word...a selfish word.

If I think of Life as opportunities to "give and receive" it feels much more peaceful.  It reminds me that I'm not in control...which I'm not anyway even though some days I like to pretend that I am!

Thinking about "give and receive" takes a lot of pressure off of me.  It reminds me that I just have to do my job and let God do His....which is a good thing bc when I try to do His job everything gets screwed up!  It's actually a relief to remind myself that everything does not depend on me!  When things get too crazy and out of balance I tend to forget that!

Thankfully, this very moment is an opportunity to practice the concept of "give and receive". God willing....there will be many more days to work on letting go and letting God!

Throw Back Thursday!

Throw Back Thursday!

I found an old picture of Jay from when he was a young teen!  He definitely had the 80's look going on!:)

Jon saw me scanning the pic...

Jon:  Is that Dad?!?
Me:  Yes...look at that hair!
Jon:  (chuckling)  Look at that everything!

Lol:)

Throw Back Thursday

Throw back Thursday!  Look how cute these little ones are!  Ellie was 2 and Sarah was 6.  It's hard to remember how little they were....especially since Ellie is a few weeks away from turning 12 and Sarah will be 16(!) in May and both of them are almost as tall as I am!  

Seeing these pictures make me appreciate Kate's littleness even more!(and the picture makes my heart ache just a little!)  The days are long, but the years are short!

Seeking Perspective

I can't believe it's been almost two weeks since I've blogged! Well....I can believe it because last week felt like it lasted a month!

Last Monday, Kate woke up at 4am vomiting.  She vomited about 10 times Monday, had no vomiting during the day on Tuesday.  Then, just as I went to bed on Tuesday at 10:30, vomited every 20 minutes to half hour until 2:45.  It.was.awful! On Wednesday we took her to the doctor hoping for Zophran for the stomach bug we assumed she had.  Turns out...she had strep!  She never even complained about her throat and barely had a fever!  I have never had a child vomit that much with strep!

See...after 8 kids I'm still learning!

It took her the rest of the week and the weekend to seem back to herself!  Poor Kate!  I'm still recovering from the extreme sleep deprivation!  It's been a rough couple of weeks!

Things with my Jamberry Nails business have been very busy, too!  Which is great!  It was just tough to try and stay organized with Kate being so sick.(and no sleep...did I mention that yet!?!)

It's still Lent!

I have to be honest.  I'm still feeling discombobulated with life!  Everything seems a little upside down and overwhelming. I feel like I can give all that I can give every waking hour of each day...and then several times during the nightly wake-up times my lovely cherubs provide....and I just can't get ahead in any facet of my life!

Too much busyness with Jay's schedule, too many bills, too much on the to-do list, and too little time....it all makes me feel like giving up!  I know I'm looking through dirty lenses because it's been a rough couple of weeks health wise....and a rough couple of months weather wise!  Things will get better...Spring and warmer weather are coming!

Sometimes, hope seems a little elusive lately!  It's definitely an opportunity to focus on staying in the moment and on the blessings we have each day.  Somehow it always works out.....eventually!

I've really been enjoying Dynamic Catholic's Lenten series:  "Best Lent Ever".  If you haven't looked into it, there's still 2.5 weeks of Lent left!  It's not too late:)

Yesterday, Dynamic Catholic shared a prayer that St. Francis suggested we pray:
"Holy Spirit, may my heart be open to the Word of God,
may my heart be open to good,
may my heart be open to the beauty of God, every day."

I love it!  I want to work on memorizing Philippians 4:8, too.(I'm terrible at memorizing verses!)
Finally, beloved, whatever is true, 
whatever is honorable,whatever is just, whatever is pure, 
whatever is pleasing,whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Sometimes...all I need is a change in perspective!:)