Quick Takes and Catch Up

 It's been forever since I've written a blogpost...well, at least one I've officially typed up. I've "written" a dozen in my head over the past few months but just never gotten around to/took the time to actually sit down and type them out officially. There's a lot of reasons for that...the cop out would be to say I've been busy just riding the wave of life. And that's partially true....and for now it's the easiest reason. I'm praying on getting back into deeper posts, though I'm not quite there yet. 

I thought a little catch up might help me ease back into the blogging waters.

I can't believe it's been three whole months since I posted! Lots of life has been lived and a new little person has been added to our family! I think I'll try to stick to (mostly) chronological order and go from there!

1. Graduation(#1)

Ellie finished high school! As for many families, Covid wreaked some havoc in our lives and Ellie, Jay and I made the prayerful decision for Ellie not to return to Bishop Stang last fall. Instead, she was officially "homeschooled" but took classes through our local community college that fulfilled the rest of her high school credit needs and gave her credits for college. It wasn't a traditional way to do senior year, but it was the way that worked best for her. If we have learned anything over the 28 years that we have been parents, it's that what works for one child won't necessarily work for another. We have to be ready to zig and zag and let go of plans and expectations. Not an easy thing to do sometimes. 

Even though finishing up her classes didn't have the fanfare and ceremony that accompanies a traditional senior year, Ellie did great and will be commuting to Bridgewater State University next week to study Business. Between some AP credits and her BCC classes from last year, she's starting as a Sophomore, which is exciting!

Ellie and Leo

2. A Much Needed Small Family Getaway

With all the chaos of 2020 and 2021, I was feeling a little desperate to just get away. By January/February last year, the usual winter isolation was so much harder to deal with as we were still dealing with masks and things shut down or just still so far from "normal". Being stuck inside because of the cold was even harder to deal with than other winters. I started looking daily at how inexpensive it would be to fly to Florida and sending Jay text messages about trips. But with the twins due in March, we didn't feel like it was the best decision to go away at that point. I really needed something tangible to look forward to, so we decided to plan a trip for mid June. But then, Liz's doctor told her that there was a possibility that her baby could arrive early depending on how well they were able to control her blood pressure issues, which fell at that mid June mark. Since I really needed to plan a trip away for my mental health, Jay and I decided to plan a trip for the third week of May. We took Peter, Luke and Kate out of school and flew to Disney for a week. We didn't tell them about it until 2 days before we left, because so many things have had to be postponed or canceled over the last year that I didn't want them to be disappointed.

Like most people travelling, we didn't share a lot about our trip. There has been a lot of "shaming" going on in social media for doing things that some consider "too risky" because of covid, so we had an old fashioned, non social media documented trip. Well, at least until now! ;) 

It was a lot of fun! We stayed in hotels that most of us have never stayed in before. We did a split stay: 4 nights at the Polynesian and 3 nights at the Boardwalk. (I stayed at the Polynesian a couple of times as a little girl, and I also stayed there last October during another undocumented short trip that I took with just Jon and Peter that was a rescheduled graduation trip....originally planned for the day the world shut down in March, 2020!)

Luke and Kate loved the volcano pool at the the Polynesian! Since it was May, and hot(!), we spent a lot of time in the pool around our visits to the parks. Jay loved his stay at the Polynesian because of the close proximity of dole whip! lol We tried some new restaurants, ate at some of our favorites, tried new snacks, and I finally got a boba ball drink in Animal Kingdom. Our goal for the trip was for it to be life giving and child led. The last year has been a lot for everyone, Kate and Luke included, and with all the changes in our family Jay and I felt like the youngest have been short changed at times in the attention department. We've never taken them on a trip by themselves, and it was really nice to only divide our attention among 3 kids! Planning a trip for 5 people vs 12-14 is SO much easier!!! 

3. Vaca Pics

Since #2 was more of a "long take" than a "quick take", pics get their own spot!:)

Luke driving by himself!

Via Napoli...one of our favorites! Especially Kate's!

Luke loving all thing Star Wars!

Kate getting a ride in Peter's wheelchair.
Peter wasn't hurt...it's just easier for us to keep
him from wandering off and getting lost in a crowd!

Jungle Cruise

Yak and Yeti...such a good meal!

Mickey Pops! My favorite snack!

Date night in!

Toy Story Mania

Pirate Luke...Aargh!

Rise of the Resistance...such a cool ride!

Peter...sitting and snacking in his happy place!

4. Countdown To Grandbaby #3

The month of June was a big countdown to Grandbaby #3. Liz wanted to be surprised about having a boy or a girl...much to Andrew's chagrin! Andrew would say, "Liz, you hate surprises! Why do you want to be surprised about one of the biggest moments of your life?!?" But Liz held firm, so we were all left to guess who this new little bundle would be.  Liz did great through the end of her pregnancy, navigating a mild case of gestational diabetes and sacrificing all the fun foods and monitoring her blood sugars multiple times a day. 

I took this the night before the scheduled induction.
Liz looked great!

We all held our breath as June came to an end. The doctors decided to induce the night of the 30th, but Liz went into labor on her own  during the day. The process was long and tedious as first labors sometimes are. Liz did great with Andrew being so supportive by her side every minute and, at 5:35 am, Xavier Christopher made his debut! Xavier weight 6lbs 12oz and 20.5 inches long. Mom was healthy, baby was healthy and our family was blessed with another grandson! 

Xavier Christopher

Fun fact, Andrew is not only Kate's brother, but also her Godfather. They have a really special relationship and are very close. Andrew told Kate that she could be the first person in our family to know whether she had a niece or a nephew. So, even though I got very frequent labor updates through the night from Andrew, when the baby was born, Andrew called the house to tell Kate first! She stumbled out of bed when she heard the phone ring, because she knew that call was going to be for her! It was so sweet to see her so excited...and of Andrew to treat his little sister in such a special way.

5. Graduation #2

At the end of July, Sarah graduated from Bridgewater with a graduate degree in Speech Therapy. Sarah worked really hard in a very intense program and finally reached the end! The graduation ceremony was at Gilette Stadium. She is so glad to be finished. She got a job at a local private practice and really loves the kids she is working with. She's also loving getting a paycheck! Now she gets to do those fun adulting tasks like making a budget. She's getting married in September, 2022, so she has just over a year to do some saving. With the encouragement of her older brother, Jon, who has spent a lot of his free time in the last couple of years learning about investing and saving strategies based on the FIRE movement(Financial Indepedence:Retire Early), she also opened a Vanguard account. 

Jon also writes a blog post about his experience as a college student to save money and now as a new husband and dad...(he's the one with the twins.) The name of his blog is Frugal Jon and you can check it out here!

6. Vacation Week...aka #momfail

Jay has to pick his summer vacation week in March every year. I had debated over two different weeks because of where Luke's birthday fell, but it turns out that the week I wrote on our calendar was not the same week that I gave to Jay to take off! We didn't find out about it until 3 days before his actual vacation started... I had written it down for the week after.

We had a weekend trip to the Vineyard planned that I thought was starting our vacation, but now turned out was going to be the end of our vacation and had to now be shortened a day because we had to be back on Sunday night. The biggest bummer was that we had planned a mini trip to Lego Land for Kate, Luke and Peter and they didn't have the same package for our actual week off. I moved the trip to Columbus Day weekend, but Kate and Luke were definitely disappointed. They handled it well, but Ugh:(. Not my best mom moment.

The week looked different than I thought it would, but it still went ok, and we were happy to have Jay home. The first weekend was spent celebrating Luke's 12th birthday...Laser Gate with some of his siblings and his favorite chicken pie for dinner...and saying goodbye to our Pastor who was being transferred. One day, we did an escape room with Ellie, Peter, Kate and Luke as well as lunch and shopping in Mashpee. That was a fun outing. Another day, Jay and I even got a few hours for a lunch date.  It wasn't a complete fail, but it definitely felt a little flat...at least for me.

Ambrose and Leo enjoyed the carousel...the beach, not so much!

#7. The End...Of Summer That Is

We are less than a week away from school starting. This time of year is always bittersweet! (And hectic!) School supplies, finishing summer packets, checking to see what part of their uniforms fit/need to be replaced, and trying to squeeze in just a little more summer fun can be a tad bit overwhelming! While I like Fall weather, and I like routine, I'm not feeling ready to jump back into all the early morning lunch making and afternoon homework. (Except for Peter...he needs to go back to school! Special needs kiddos thrive on their routine, and having him home full time since 8/6 has burned me out. I'm ready for a break!) But with everyone else, return to school feels bittersweet. #honesttiredmom

Lots of changes are happening for me this Fall. I will be watching the twins three days a week while Marisa is at work. One of her aunts is going to do the other two days. It will be a big adjustment! They are SO cute! Also, quite a lot of work since there are two of them! I give Jon and Marisa lots of credit...especially with the night time wake ups. (That is definitely one part of having babies that I don't miss!) 

Hopefully, we can figure out a routine that works pretty quickly. The boys and I have had a few "discussions" about going easy on Grammy since she's outnumbered!

To end on a completely positive, (and adorable) note, here are a few pics of our small gaggle of grandsons!

Leo

Ambose

Xavier

Our three amigos

Pupa and Xavier

Leo and Ambrose

Ambrose

Xavier

Holding Xavier at home for the first time

Xavier

Joining in with Kelly for Quick Takes!

The Adventures of Pupa and Grammy

 I've had this blog post written in my head for several weeks, but I think about writing it when I'm holding babies and my arms are always too full to type. (Which is an amazing problem to have!)

It's been a little over 8 weeks since the twins made their grand entrance into the world after the longest induction process I have ever seen! Marisa went into the hospital on the morning of Thursday, March 18th. A medication was started to soften her cervix further. We all thought the boys would arrive on St. Joseph's feast day, but Friday came and Marisa needed more meds to continue the cervix softening process. We were all convinced that Saturday must be the day.....WRONG! The doctor determined that Marisa still wasn't ready for pitocin on Saturday am. It was a VERY long three days in the hospital for Marisa and Jon...and quite the emotional roller coaster to psyche yourself up for labor only to be put off day after day! Because of Covid rules, no one could visit her in labor and delivery. Jon could be with her, but he couldn't leave. And because Marisa was carrying twins, they wouldn't let her go home for a night and sleep in her own bed. 

It was a loooong three days! (For the grandparents, too! It's hard not to worry and it's hard to be on the outside just receiving information and not able to do anything.)

Finally(!). around 3am Sunday morning, the doctor gave the green light for pitocin! Labor progressed slowly, (I repeat, slowly), the entire day! Marisa loved getting the epidural and declared that it was the best she felt since before she got pregnant! So clearly it worked well for her. 

Finally(!!), about 8:30pm Marisa was 10cm and it was time to push. It was the longest 45 minutes of my life. It's so hard to wait to find out that everyone is ok! 

And, FINALLY(!!!), at 9:17, Leo Jason was born! Leo was healthy, Marisa was good and, only 7 minutes later at 9:24, Ambrose Thomas joined his brother! 

For the entire pregnancy, Ambrose was "Baby A" and Leo was "Baby B"....then, right before delivery, Leo snuck ahead of his brother and was born first! I think that's going to be a big part of his personality-a tease just like his daddy! Luke commented that Leo was going to hold it over Ambrose's head that he is the oldest. Then Kate, who has empathy for being the youngest child, said that when they play board games and the rules say that the youngest goes first, then Ambrose will have the upper hand!

Leo was 6lb 4oz and Ambrose was 6lbs 7oz....which are great sizes for twins! Marisa is glad they were born almost three weeks early! Both boys were 20 inches long.

Adjusting to life with twins has been challenging! Sleep deprivation with two babies is no joke! Thankfully, they have lots of people willing to hold babies so they can take naps. It's given us extra opportunities to snuggle the boys...which is an amazing experience.

Marisa and Jon are great parents! The boys are thriving. At their one month appointments, Ambrose was 9lbs and Leo was 8lbs 14oz. And they are definitely bigger than that now!

Now that they have hit the 8 week mark, you can see them starting to slip into more of a routine with sleeping and awake time. They are starting to be content to sit in their swing or bouncy seat for half an hour or more and they are starting to fall asleep without needing to be held all the time. (Marisa and Jon are very excited and hopeful! It's amazing what you're able to get done when you can use two hands!) They are looking forward to their sleep blocks to extend a little longer...which I'm sure will be soon at the rate they are growing! 

Being a grandparent has been a joyful experience. There is just nothing like holding and snuggling a baby...and getting to hold and snuggle two babies is even more amazing! We are so blessed that they live close by and we get to see them frequently. Most week days since Jon went back to work, I get to spend some time with the boys so Marisa can shower and get ready for the day. Although, I don't think they will need me for that much longer now that the boys seem to be happy to be in their seat/swing for an extended period of time. But I'm sure that Marisa will still want a break...or a nap!...most days, so I shouldn't miss out on too many baby snuggles!

How many pics have we taken....too many to count! But here are some of my favorites:)

 

                                              Meeting these two bundles of joy for the first time!

Ambrose

                                                                        Little Leo:)

                                                (Ambrose is on the left, Leo on the right)

Jay and I are thoroughly enjoying our adventures as Pupa and Grammy!

On the Eve of Becoming a Grammy

Despite how slow the winter of 2020/2021 felt, today is proof that time, indeed, has gone by. Today, my daughter-in-law, Marisa, checked into the hospital to start the process of being induced. Marisa has done phenomenally well this entire pregnancy! Shortly after the shock that they were having twins wore off, both Jon and Marisa got excited about the two wiggly boys growing inside of her. 

Marisa is a guidance counselor and worked until March 1st, which gave her some much needed rest at the end of her pregnancy. Lugging two little boys around isn't easy...and the boys aren't too little, either! Her last ultrasound was Tuesday and they have both babies measuring around 6lbs 10oz! Those are good sized boys!

It still seems surreal to me that I will be holding my first two grandsons in my arm in just a couple of days! It doesn't feel like that long ago that I held Jon in my arms for the first time! My head and heart are all over the place today. I'm excited to see them, nervous for Marisa going through childbirth, and unsure about how I will feel as everything shifts and changes again in our family. 

I was thinking about the twins' arrival and praying after Mass today. Of course, I was praying for an easy and uneventful labor for Marisa and for a healthy mama and two healthy babies. I was also praying that, in my new role as a Grammy, that I wouldn't be "too much" or "too little" but just enough. (Sounds a little like Goldilocks and the Three Bears. lol) I want to be supportive to Marisa and Jon. I want to be a good Grammy to these two boys. I'm just not sure exactly how that's going to look. I like planning and lists, and right now it's just a lot of waiting and unknowns. We're starting a whole new adventure, and I don't want to mess it up.

New roles=new expectations. Since it's all new, I'm still trying to figure it all out. (I'm sure I will be trying to figure it all out for a while!) Being a Grammy will be a much different pace than being a mom. I'm the support staff now. I can share my experiences of being a mom, but it will be up to Jon and Marisa to do the research and make decisions for their kids based on what they feel is best for their little family. 

Different isn't bad, it's just something to get used to. Jay and I will be learning to navigate a whole new part of life....it's exciting and intimidating all at the same time.

Everyone tells me how wonderful grandchildren are because you get to enjoy them and then they go home to sleep!(or not sleep...) I think I will like that part. :)  

Please say a prayer for Marisa and Jon as they welcome Ambrose and Leo into the world. There's a lot of love that will be multiplied throughout all of our families as we start a brand new chapter of our lives! 

Much Ado About Lent

Here we are mid February and on the cusp of entering into the Lenten Season. Lent brings about a lot of different feelings for people...and, depending on the year it stirs up different emotions for me too. This year, as reminders of Lent's impending arrival showed up in my inbox from different sources starting in mid January, I found myself feeling anxious. (and deleting many of the emails without even reading them.)  I wasn't ready to face another season of penance. 

In a lot of ways, it feels like Lent 2020 never really ended.  There are still lots of restrictions.  Places that are open have capacity limits, mask rules, and table limits. There is still a lot of fear. You can't travel freely between states and you need a covid test for everything. Peter has a somewhat hybrid schedule with one day of home learning...which for kids with significant special needs is kind of a joke. He does not work independently no matter how much his wonderful teachers work on it during school days. And thanks to two Mondays in a row with snow, he had even shorter weeks with an extra "home learning" day. Lucky me!(insert eye roll here...or maybe two!)

Luke and Kate go to a local Catholic School that has been in person since the beginning of the year. There are some families that have chosen to do home learning, which they accommodate, but the majority of kids have been in school. For the last two weeks, Kate and Luke have been home learning because of an uptick in covid numbers at their school. It was an unpleasant reminder of how hard the end of last year's school was. I'm grateful that we've made it this far into the school year without any major problems, but as many parents are experiencing, home learning has its challenges. 

A year ago at this time, our little space in the world was still "normal". Coronavirus was something that was far away and I don't think anyone could have imagined how it would change our lives...and continue to affect us so greatly almost an entire year later! I think fear and burnout have been the two biggest stressors for me over the past year...and I still haven't recovered from either. This has been such a hard 11 months...and I don't feel any motivation to give things up and enter into a time of penance after all the turmoil we continue to live through on so many different levels.

Even during Advent, I felt more connection to standing with Mary at the foot of the cross on Calvary than sitting in a stable with a newborn Savior. 

Yet, Lent is starting on Wednesday and I'm trying to be open to the areas God wants me to work on. It's a challenge because I'm already feeling stretched thin...especially after the last two weeks of home learning and now having the kids home for vacation week. The bitter cold and snow we've been having doesn't help, either! I feel trapped inside and, with all the restrictions in place, there's not much to outside the house anyway. I daydream about escaping on a plane to Florida...where the weather is warmer and the restrictions are lighter...but with twin grandbabies arriving sometime in the next 5 weeks, travel seems selfish right now. (But, I have to admit, that I might have looked at available Southwest flights a few times!)

I know that while some of my desires to escape are for good reasons, not all of my motives are healthy. While I'm sure a week in Florida would feel amazing in some ways, it's not going to fill what's really missing inside of my heart. Only God can do that....and getting away would just be me trying to fill myself. Unfortunately, I know from past experience that it won't work. It's just a distraction and keeps me from focusing on the issue(s?) God wants me to address. In the short term, distractions can seem a whole lot more attractive.

I'm in the midst of a traumatic season. In my heart, I know I need to simplify.What does that  mean to me? It means working on the basics: sleeping, eating, exercising, and praying....not necessarily in that order. I plan on using Lent to focus on these four area.

1. Sleep

I have been sleep deprived for years. The majority of my kids have been lousy sleepers. Luke still wakes up a couple times a week because of nightmares.(he's 11) I've been struggling with my own nightmares and vivid dreams for a while, too. I know I need to stick to a better schedule so that I have time to wind down at night and give myself an opportunity to get the amount of rest I need. For me, that means no more mindless scrolling after 9:15. Jay and I usually relax together on the couch once we get Kate and Luke in bed around 8:30. We tend to watch Hallmark, The Food Network, or a football/Celtics/Red Sox game depending on the season. At 10, we put the dog out one more time, lock up, put Peter to bed, and head to bed ourselves. I like to read until 10:30ish and recently made a personal rule not to start a new chapter after 10:30! I recently found a couple of new to me authors I'm enjoying, Rachel Hauck and Katherine Reay.(good reads, nothing too traumatic, and clean!...if you have any author recommendations please leave them in the comments:) 

I also give myself some time to rest most afternoons. I try to give myself 30-60 minutes to read something enjoyable and take a 15 minute power nap if I need it. 

2. Eating

Does anyone not have issues with food? Between too many months of "comfort eating" combined with being in my mid 40's has left me in a place of not being comfortable in my own skin. I have also found that some food...particularly packaged snack foods....tend to give me headaches. For Lent, I usually give up snacking but this year I want to also focus on eating more whole foods. It's never easy to focus on healthy choices, but my body needs it. 

3. Exercising

This part isn't as hard for me. My parents gave us a recumbent bike they never used much last year and I have used it consistently since then...especially in the winter weather when I can't walk outside. My goal is 5 days a week. I also want to add in daily stretching exercises and some simple ab exercises a couple times a week. I don't love to exercise...quite the opposite really! I do love listening to podcasts, so when I use the bike I distract myself with my favorite speakers. I'll share my favorites in #4.

4. Prayer 

What's one problem area that has come up multiple times in the last month or two that highlighted a weakness or brokenness in your life? Try making a sacrifice or adding something in based on that. 

Have more than one? Me, too! If I had to pick the most prominent issue, mine would be hopelessness. It's been a tough year. So, I need to work on trust. I'm thinking about rereading The Life of Faustina Kowalska....because trust and Divine Mercy go hand in hand...and adding in a Divine Mercy Chaplet at the 3pm hour each day. 

I want to go to daily Mass as much as I can...which is dependent upon the kids being able to attend school. Having some time before or after each Mass to read scripture, a spiritual book(like St. Faustina or my current read, Falling Home by Hallie Lord), and spending a little time journaling is a goal as well. On the days I can't do the reading in Church, I will set aside time to do at home.  

Part of my plan for Lent is to not plan everything. Sometimes what I think I'm supposed to work on is very different from what God has planned. When I allow God to lead, He presents me with opportunities to grow that I didn't plan on. This way, I don't look at things, (like home learning), that I wasn't planning on as distractions to "my" Lenten plans, but as opportunities. I want to resolve to offer up the unplanned struggles, frustrations or suffering for whoever God puts on my heart at those moments. Let's face it, there are plenty of people in our lives that could use extra prayers and grace right now!

Need some ideas for good Podcasts? Here are some of my current favorites:

The Bible in a Year...I'm learning a lot from this one with Fr. Mike Schmitz. It started January 1st, but you can start any time. Definitely a good one for Lent.

UMD Newman Catholic also Fr. Mike...he shares his Sunday homily every week. Always lots to ponder.

Abiding Together...my favorite podcast I listen to every week. It's almost always my Monday morning workout go to!

Poco A Poco...a newly found favorite. I love the banter of the CFR brothers who host this podcast. There's a lot of good conversation and camaraderie between them and in every episode, there are 15 min where one of them shares something incredible deep and meaningful that I find myself rewinding to listen to and write down.

Blessed is She, Girlfriends, Called and Caffeinated, A Seeking Heart, and Not Lukewarm are also podcasts I enjoy listening to. 

Have any favorite podcasts to share? What are your plans for Lent? 

I would love to hear...please share in the comments.

P.S. Can I make a plug for community?!? Many of us are feeling isolated and we can't be a part of the regular in person groups we have been missing for a long time now. Find a friend or two (or three) and meet regularly in whatever way everyone is comfortable with. Share your Lenten journey together...because, in this crazy time, we all need connection more than ever. 

We Plan, God Laughs(a.k.a. 2020)

 I haven't linked up with Kelly or done Seven Quick Takes in a while. It's a good way to catch up with some of our bigger news. Although I should probably call it "Not So Quick" Quicktakes!

1. We Plan, God Laughs

That could have been the theme of 2020! Like many people, we had a family wedding that got postponed, rescheduled, and then rearranged to follow the state guidelines of what we could and couldn't do! At the end of June, my son, Jon, married our lovely daughter-in-law Marisa in a beautiful ceremony that didn't happen when it was originally planned, with a fun reception that wasn't held where it was supposed to be originally held, but was perfect just the same. (You can get all the details of their wedding and Covid backup plan  backyard reception here.)

We joked with them that the theme of their marriage was going to be "unexpected" after all the craziness of planning and replanning all of the events surrounding the wedding!

That theme continued quickly when, only a month after being married, they found out Marisa was pregnant!  #honeymoonbaby! They told us the day the pregnancy was confirmed at the Dr's office and they were both pretty shell shocked. After all the ups and downs during the spring with all the wedding issues, finally getting married and just getting started with married life, they had been through a lot of changes! Now they were faced with another happy...but very big life change....to adjust to!

Marisa and Jon told our older crew about the pregnancy a week later but wanted to hold off telling Kate and Luke until Marisa had her first OB appointment a couple weeks later. Their siblings were VERY excited for them. Marisa and Jon were just starting to adjust to the shock and get excited at the idea of being parents when God threw another level of "unexpected" in for fun.....

2. (Hint: Because the Number 2 is Appropriate)

TWINS!!!

(and the shock came back full force!)

TWO sacs, TWO heartbeats, and TWO very surprised (and overwhelmed) parents! 

3. Expect the Unexpected

Once the second shock wave wore off, there was a lot of excitement. Since they have had enough surprises  for one year, Jon and Marisa wanted to find out the baby’s genders. Thankfully, the babies cooperated! We did a tiny reveal party with just the immediate family that Marisa's parents hosted with some pizza and homemade cakes made by Jon and Marisa. 

Marisa’s parents cut the cake for Baby A and Jay and I cut the cake for Baby B. 

And........ Jon and Marisa are having.......

TWO BOYS!!

4. The Name Game

Jon and Marisa had a short list of baby names they both liked. It didn’t take them long to choose!(they are both planners:) 

Baby A’s name is Ambrose Thomas. Thomas is Marisa’s Dad’s name. :) Ambrose is proving to be the calmer of the twins in utero. He is much more of a chill baby. In the 3D ultrasound, they got a really good pic of Ambrose. Marisa thinks he looks like Jon.

Sweet little Ambrose<3

Baby B’s name is Leo Jason. After Jay:) Leo is much more active than his brother and is already causing mischief. Leo is always getting under Marisa’s ribs and making her uncomfortable. Leo did not stay still enough to get a good pic during the 3D ultrasound. It looks like a Picasso! You could see Leo’s mouth pretty clearly and it looks just like Marisa’s mouth. So I think that Ambrose is going to look like Jon but act like Marisa and Leo will look like Marisa and act like Jon.(who has always been the tease and mischief maker of the family!)

Wiggly Leo!

In this week's regular ultrasound pic, they finally got a profile of Leo(Baby B on the right) 
Ambrose has his little arm in front of his face.

After several months of tough morning sickness, Marisa feels good but uncomfortable. The babies weigh about 3 1/2 lbs each and are growing well. The goal date is March 25th. We are praying they stay in long enough to avoid any NICU stays. We are getting very excited to meet these two little blessings!

5. And Speaking of Blessings...

What’s better than two grandbabies?? 

Well...three grandbabies of course!

In early November, Andrew and Liz surprised Jay and I and Liz’s parents with a very happy pregnancy announcement! Andrew and Liz invited the four of us for dinner...which they have done before so we weren’t suspecting anything. They made an Asian inspired chicken dish and served fortune cookies for dessert. These were special fortune cookies they had ordered to announce their news! 

 

Photo credit to Liz's sister, Victoria

Andrew and Liz’s bundle of joy is due on July 6th. 

Baby Hamel at 8 weeks<3

In another week or so Liz will have her 18 week ultrasound. I can’t wait to get a clearer peek of this precious blessing! Liz wants to be surprised when the baby is born, so we will be guessing for a while whether we will get a granddaughter or another little grandson. I can guarantee that I will be found in local stores buying clothes in the appropriate colors the day after their baby is born...or the hour after depending on the time this little one arrives!

6. Picking a Name...For Us

It’s a little surreal that we are grandparents! Kate’s only 9 so it wasn’t that long ago that I was pregnant myself and nursing little ones. It’s a big shift...a happy one but still a little hard to get used to. We’ve gone back and forth about what we want the babies to call us. I’ve thought about it occasionally over the last few years when grandbabies were just in my imagination. I had been leaning towards Mimi. Marisa’s sister had a sweet little girl last year and Marisa’s mom, Cathy, chose to be Mimi. (whomp whomp) And both our husbands are boring and just want to be called ‘Grandpa’ so it will be too confusing for the twins to have two sets of grandparents with the same names!

So I think I want to be called Grammie? or Grammy? Idk if the "ie" just makes it seem that I'm trying too hard to stay young!?!  Thoughts? Suggestions?

(P.S. Jon says that Cathy and I are being “extra”. Lol)

7. One More Addition to the Family

I bet you thought I was going to say I’m having a baby too! Nope! I’m too old and tired for that!;)

But our family is growing again...Sarah is engaged! Her fiance, Mike, is serving as a Marine in Japan. (You can find out about how Sarah met him here.) He was finally able to come home on leave after being gone for over two years in October. (thanks Covid) Mike and Sarah spent the almost month he was home together every day. Towards the end of his visit, he proposed.

Photo credit to Ellie...Mike brought her along as official photographer:)

Mike won't be done with his time in the military until August, 2022. They are planning on getting married sometime in September, 2022. (I needed a few months off from wedding planning after this summer, but Sarah and I have started having conversations about what she would like her wedding and reception to look like and we will probably start researching options next week.)

Of course, like I said at the beginning, we plan and God laughs. So we will do our part and just see how it goes. Thankfully, I have lots of experience planning, unplanning, and replanning large events now!

Have a great weekend!

Remember To Look Up

Back in the Fall, Jay and I went through a difficult week with one of our kids. There were big life decisions being considered and details that deeply concerned us. There were lots of discussions happening that seemed to be having the opposite effect of what we were trying to accomplish; open and honest dialogue just seemed to end with more hurt and confusion. It was a struggle that was compounded by the emotional burnout we were already experiencing after the trials and crosses from the spring and summer months. 

We didn’t have much to give and another emotional battle was threatening to drown us as a family. I wasn’t sure we had any fight left after everything we had gone through and, to be honest, there were moments that I just wanted to give up and stop trying to find a way to fix it.

Is there any situation(s) in your life that have you nodding your head right now?  Keep reading...maybe the advice that helped us will encourage you.<3 

Jay and I did a lot of talking and praying over the course of a few days. We knew we needed help to work through it all and we sought that help. We spoke to a therapist and each of us spoke to the Deacon at our parish, who we are immensely blessed to have. As hard as it was to work through all the emotions of what I was feeling, my constant prayer was, “Please, God, don’t let me make the situation worse.” 

I approached Deacon Dave after daily Mass during this tumultuous week. I had a lot of grief and a lot of anger that I needed help to work through. Deacon did a lot of listening in the hour + I spent with him that morning. He also shared some stories from his own parenting days which helped to remind me that I’m not alone in my parenting struggles. It also gave me hope because his children are all adults with families of their own that they are close to. There are certainly benefits to talking to parents who have survived the trenches!

There was one thing that Deacon said that really struck me and allowed my perspective to change very quickly. Deacon said, “You need to pray....what does God want in this situation?” In that moment, God reminded me that I was not in control. It wasn’t my job to convince said child about the negative consequences that could come out of the decisions that were being discussed. It wasn’t my job to change anyone’s heart. That was God’s job. Having that responsibility lifted from me took away the anger I had been struggling with. Being able to respond to the situation we were working through without anger was very important to not further damage relationships or cause deeper rifts and unnecessary pain to occur. Not causing more brokenness for myself or anyone involved was important to me....it’s much easier to fix a cup broken in a few big pieces than one that has been shattered. 

The situation still hurt, but my focus had shifted. I was no longer just looking at the hurt and trying to figure out a way to fix it. I was reminded to look up and remember Who it was that could truly fix the situation. I prayed for openness for Jay and I as well as for our child....for all of us to see what was best and to have the grace to accept it. I didn’t just pray for our wishes and desires to be followed....I’ve learned that, even though we love our kids more than anything, what we want for them isn’t always what God has planned.

We took a deep, unsteady breath and tried again. It took a few more days, but God finally provided an opening. There were difficult conversations...and a few tears...but the confusion finally lifted and we all realized that so much of the hurt that everyone was feeling was based on miscommunication and misunderstanding. And even though it took several weeks to start to feel “normal” again as everyone worked through their own thoughts and feelings about how this situation affected them, I know that everyone involved learned a lot. (Hopefully enough so that we can avoid any similar situations in the future !!)

Despite the hurt, that tough week provided a blessing through Deacon Dave for me...the reminder to “look up” when things are too hard and too heavy and to remember to ask: “God, what is your will?”

“He reached from on high, he took me, 

He drew me out of many waters. 

He delivered me from my strong enemy, 

and from those who hated me; 

for they were too mighty for me.

 They came upon me in the day of my calamity; but the Lord was my stay. 

He brought me forth into a broad place;

 he delivered me, because he delighted in me.” 

Psalm 18:16-19